Toliets!

That's right, toilets!

The first sh*ts have been fired in the scorched-earth war that will be the Illinois Governors’ race….and it’s all about toilets. According to a “Rauner for Governor” ad we are privy to the sordid details of democratic candidate J.B. Pritzker’s ploy to lower the property taxes on his Chicago Gold Coast home. Apparently Pritzker bought the mansion, took out the toilets, claimed that the residence was uninhabitable and asked for a drastic reduction in his property tax.

Not to be outdone, Pritzker has launched an attack ad of his own, claiming that Rauner owns 22 homes across the country and has asked for property tax relief on at least eight of them. The commercial then wonders why, if Rauner helps himself to tax relief, does he oppose it when honest, ordinary billionaires do it, too?

Let’s do the math here: the election is a little less than 4 months away and the campaign has already descended into the sewers. Pun, unfortunately, intended.

Stay tuned for a lot more of the same. According to CBS news, Rauner has reportedly bought about $1.5 million in air time for campaign commercials in the Chicago market, and Pritzker has spent about $1 million. According to political strategists on both sides of the aisle, Pritzker and Rauner are prepared to make this THE MOST EXPENSIVE governor’s race in history.

It’s a battle of the billionaires and we, the citizens of the great state of Illinois, better stock up on pink Pepto because the poop will be flying.